I realized something weird about myself yesterday. I think I’m competitive.
Not in a I’m-gonna-win-this-race-if-it’s-the-last-thing-I-do kinda way, or a Tonya Harding way, but in a calm, laid back kind of way. If that makes any sense.
That’s the only way I can explain it to myself, at least. I was never very good at sports (I won the Most Team spirit award on my church basketball league team, if that tells you anything) and was genuinely shocked when I placed first in my age group in a 5k I ran in Cape in the spring (that’s the only time that will EVER happen). But, speaking of that, I do remember sulking for a moment when they called someone else’s name for 2nd place until they called my name for 1st—this was because my friend Jess and I snuck a look at the lists and I saw I was in running to place second. But since the actual first-place winner in my age group placed female first overall, I was bumped up to first. So momentary sulking over thinking I had not placed must mean something, right? Oh, dear goodness.
Well, I write all of this because yesterday, something very funny happened. It was my last 20th Century English Literature class, and it was my turn to present on the novel we were reading—The God of Small Things. A few days before, the teacher had emailed us and told us we were splitting the class in half and only discussing the book the first half of the class period. Knowing that + knowing another girl in my class was also presenting on The God of Small Things (a FRIEND, mind you, a fellow fiction MFAer, if that just tells you even more about my craziness) = flustered Katherine. I was suddenly very anxious that I would not get to present, and I was excited to present, since I thought Roy’s novel was awesome (seriously, read it. Stop reading this and pick that up instead. No, not really. Maybe…).
But anyway, this left me with a panicky feeling, nervous about not getting my chance to speak, and so I decided I needed to step back and figure out what was going on. I wasn’t trying to sabotage Vanessa’s chance to present, or under the impression she would talk so long that I wouldn’t get a chance to speak. I was just anxious, like the stomach-nervous-feeling you get right before you perform your part in a play.
So maybe that’s not competitiveness. But it’s got to be something, right? I’m still trying to figure it out.
On a different note, D.C. coffeeshop day! I tried out Peregrine this time in Eastern Market. Their website is deceiving (the grapes threw me off), so that’s why I didn’t come in for a long time. But I decided I had enough time today to trek out to Eastern Market and I secured a back-up option just in case.
But, I was fine with my first option. Any place that puts a heart design on my latte is a plus for me. And I like when they ask you if it’s for here or not—it’s like they genuinely care what you’re doing with your time. That actually may not be the case, but this place has a nice feel to it. The green walls are soothing and, even though it’s gotten a heck of a lot of traffic since I’ve been here, it hasn’t gotten overwhelming or too loud. So I’d say it’s a keeper.
Oh, and the Chocolate Covered Reese’s Oreos turned out deliiiiiciously: