The truth about being a chronically late person…

…is that you’re always hoping for a miracle.

I’m not talking like John Green’s Paper Towns, where Quentin believes Margo is his one miracle in life. I’m talking, “crap-I-left-10-minutes-later-than-I-meant-to-why-I-am-surprised-by-that-oh-here’s-hoping-I-still-get-to-work-on-time” kind of miracle.
I will say, though, that I’ve had several trips to Target/CVS/Safeway/ etc that were exactly like the Paper Towns’ characters’ speedy trips to gas stations, except with one crucial difference: my trips were speedy because I was making them before class when I really didn’t have time.

As a chronically late person, I’m constantly hoping for some kind of time miracle where I miraculously get to work five minutes early, even though I left 10 minutes late. I’m constantly hoping that some kind of time warp thing will happen and I’ll get to my class with plenty of time to spare to leisurely look over my class notes for the day, or write on the chalkboard. I’m constantly hoping that time will play its tricks, as time does, and I’ll be able to walk to class at a normal pace instead of an awkward mix of speed walking and hopping.
As a reminder, this awkward mix of speed walking and hopping is exactly how I fractured my leg this past February. While walking to my first class. While (sort of) late. I’m definitely doing this to myself.

As I constantly route and reroute my travel to and from work, looking for the quickest and easiest drive that day, I’ve begun to realize something: as a 28-year-old adult, I still don’t understand how time works. I’ll usually set a goal leaving time and, even though I know I have to be out the door in thirty minutes, or 45 minutes, or whatever, I lie to myself about the time. I let myself eat lunch slowly, or prep dinner for that night, or try to finish grading a paper, forgetting that a leaving time of 1:20 means out the door by 1:20, not “oh crap, it’s 1:20, let me run around the apartment like an idiot to collect my stuff so I can leave.” I’m usually out the door five to ten minutes after my goal leaving time. Three on a lucky day.

Then, because this has happened before (not a lot), I hope for a time miracle as I drive to work. I hold out hope that ten extra minutes will pop up somewhere, forgetting that all of this is contingent on traffic, other cars, and other people in general. Which all points to one very simple thing:

I’ve got to slow down.

Even though I can lollygag with the best of them, I usually jampack my day with to-do lists. I really try to prioritize the to-do lists but, on some days, I have a hard time keeping an order straight and try to accomplish several things at once. This morning, I let bleach soak in my shower while I vacuumed and checked my email. I’m often on my phone (even if it’s just Instagram or WWF) during a movie or TV show, trying to get two things done at once. I multi-task and try to soak every second out of every hour to make sure I’m not wasting time.

And then I drive to school like an idiot, hoping that extra time will appear.

Anyone struggle with the same problem? Do you have suggestions on better time management? I’m not talking like “lay out your outfit the night before” or “just leave earlier, dummy.” Like, for real advice on looking at time realistically and not Katherine-ally.

Using planners and to-do lists has started to organize my mind a little and help me manage my time in a more realistic way. I’ve loved Erin Condren planners for YEARS, even though they’re a bit pricey. The “get it done” zebra notepad is a new purchase and I LOVE IT. Every time I look at it, I chuckle at the little zebra essentially telling me to get my shit together. 

Rifle Paper Co. // Erin Condren 

 

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I always knew Andy Dwyer was my Spirit Animal

I recently started a 6-week summer job, which means I’m back in my office for office hours. Those first office hours always seem to drag on, as most students don’t come to office hours the day after their first session and I have no papers to grade yet. So, what did I do to pass the time? In addition to some class planning and other busy work, I took this quiz, of course.

I answered truthfully instead of trying to manipulate the outcome (it’s so easy to get the result you want on these stupid quizzes), so the fact that I got Andy Dwyer means A LOT. What does it mean, exactly? It means that ANDY DWYER IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL.

I loved Jurassic World and Guardians of the Galaxy, but Chris Pratt as Andy Dwyer is still my favorite thing. I think it’s awesome that he has found such success as an action star–just like it’s amazing the success that Melissa McCarthy has found after “starting out” on GG–but goofy, good-natured, hopelessly helpless (most of the time) Andy is my favorite character.

PLUS, HE IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL. Here’s how I know, expressed in GIF form, of course.

When I’m running in a 1,000 degree heat for the half marathon my friend Cassie and I signed up to run in September: 

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Why we decided to train for a race in the MIDDLE OF THE FREAKIN SUMMER, I will never know. Or, better yet, why the marathon people decided to hold a race that forces participants to train in the MIDDLE OF THE FREAKIN SUMMER.
In all honesty, my runs have actually been very frustrating lately. Like, discouraging to the point that I dread a run, which has never happened before. Sure, I’ve not wanted to run sometimes, but I’ve never dreaded it. The only way I was FINALLY able to run three miles yesterday without stopping was by watching “Parks & Rec” on TV. 

When I explain to anyone that will listen (because I talk a lot) why I’d never be able to do any of those crazy diets because I love cheese too much:

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Seriously. I love cheese. And diets are stupid. (Tell that to Katherine who ate pizza twice on Saturday…#oops #noregrets)

Whenever I surprise someone with my intellect:

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Whenever I try to do anything related to technology in anyway: 

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Technological related things Rahul has had to help me with in the past: losing my entire iTunes library, not being able to figure out how to set up new pages on WordPress, signing up for HBOGo and then not being able to access it on my computer, getting locked out of my Verizon account, 1,000 other things I can’t think of right now…he’s very patient when it comes to me and my lack of technology knowledge.

Whenever I try to do things in general: 

anigif_enhanced-11666-1406775913-1OK, I’m maybe not THIS bad, but I have broken two wine glasses this year, a plate, spilled my water bottle in my bag and on student papers more times that I can count, broken a fourth of the blinds in my apartment (they’re really crappy blinds!), and other general problems.

When I realize how frustrated I am at my current lack of creativity:

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This is actually a serious, legitimate one. I’ve been in a major creative rut lately. I can’t seem to land on a story idea that I like enough to keep writing. Also, all of my recent ideas have become too long, and I really, REALLY just want to write some short stories right now until I feel up to finishing my thesis project, which is a novel-length project. I feel like I used to have SO MANY story ideas and, lately, I’ve had nothing. It’s very frustrating and upsetting and makes me question my abilities as a writer. A lot of the stories I’ve started recently start to feel POINTLESS because I don’t know where they’re going or what to do with them. Plus, all of my plot lines become too serious and too bizarre, and I just want simple storytelling. I loved the first season of the TV show “Broadchurch” (seriously, go watch it now if you haven’t) for many reasons, but one of the main reasons I loved it was because of the last episode. The whole season centers around a young boy’s death in a really small town, where everyone knows everyone. Thus, the idea of a killer among them was hard for the townspeople to grasp. Instead of the show leading up to a serial killer or killing someone to cover up a secret (kind of like in “The Killing”), the death was caused by pure human error. It was caused by a character who was experiencing something he didn’t fully understand, which caused him to do something he never expected to do. I’m speaking cryptically because I don’t want to give anything away, but I LOVED this about the show. Even though the mysteriousness of his death kept me watching, I loved (I can’t stop saying that word) that his death was caused by humanity, in a sense. So, all of that to say, I’m trying to find a way to do that in my writing, and it’s hard. And it makes me feel like the above gif. Sigh.

Whenever I try to explain science-related things:

anigif_enhanced-21527-1406774805-3 (2)Also, on a related note, I love snacks. Written while I shovel popcorn into my mouth. I LOVE this popcorn but I can’t find it in my grocery store anymore, but their website says it should be in stock there…LIES!

Whenever I miss Bella and try to convince Rahul we need a cat:

Plo5yPpBecause cats are the best…

Whenever I’m at the grocery store and I forget the difference between 1% milk and skim (read: every time):

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Whenever I drive in D.C. and get upset at the terrible, mean, type-A drivers who clearly all have more important places to be than anyone else on the road and I consider throwing my  car into the Potomac (because I have superpowers like that):

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Whenever I accidentally find myself in a conversation about politics or anything government related: 

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Lastly, whenever I’m freaking out about my medical complications, which happened a lot this past year. 

I used the phrase “they took my blood away for science” WAY too many times. But hey, it kept me laughing during my super anxious moments, as did this!

Source for above GIFs: NBC via Imgur & Buzzfeed.

 

 

Looking Back at my 25 Year Old Goals as a 28 Year Old

For the past little while, I’ve noticed that a blog post from 2012, 25 Life Goals from a 25 Year Old, has been getting a lot of viewership. I don’t know the reason for this, because I also don’t fully understand how the internet works. Either way, I thought I’d revisit these goals, written a little over three years ago, to see which ones I’m sticking to, which ones I think are completely bonkers (or don’t make sense), and any new goals I have.

Reading a three-year old post was delightful and entertaining. These goals are definitely the ones of a young, optimistic person. There’s nothing wrong with them, but many of them seem a little too hippy-dippy for my current state. Some also seem crafted and written specifically for a blog post, instead of realistic, true goals. Again, nothing wrong with that, but if I had written this today, I would have surely used different language.

Something I’ve realized in the three years since I turned 25 is that life is magical and ever-evolving. After turning 25, I experienced a life crisis of sorts. In college, 25 seemed so old. I expected to have everything figured out by 25 and that I would basically be a billionaire living on the ocean in an exotic country or something. Since turning 25, I’ve adjusted my worldview and come to understand that life is often a slow burn (in a good way) and that things take time. Also, I’ve realized that age is just a number. Sure, there are certain things that I should be doing by 28–like saying thank you, or doing things I want to do, and a handful of other things on this list–but most of these are just general being-a-decent-person life goals. I set these goals at 25 as a reminder to myself to take ownership of my life, and that mindset is still just as prevalent today. So, in a way, they’re life goals from my 25-year-old self that I can stick to and adapt and mold for as long as I want.

New Goals:

1. Find ways to work on my anxiety. I’ve developed a lot of anxiety over the past year (thanks, fractured leg), and I’m trying to find ways to reign it in.

2. Get out of my apartment and stop wasting time. I waste so much time, especially when school is out for the summer.

3. Never get tired of my surroundings. DC is a great city, and I never want to feel like I’m just “tolerating” it.

4. Don’t underestimate or undervalue myself. I’ve had a revelation of sorts lately where I realized the reason why I hardly ever spoke in any of my classes as a student was because I was underestimating myself, not the other way around. I’m learning to value my voice more, as well as my own opinion, and finding ways to more thoughtfully engage in conversations.

5. Write write write write write!!!

The Original List: 

1. Write thank you cards. Say thank you.
I’ve done okay on this one. I usually remember to send thank you cards, and try to always say thank you when I feel genuinely thankful for someone’s help, advice, you name it. 

2. Take a moment to calm down when overly emotional. Re-consider your thoughts.
Eh. What can I say? It’s that quarter-Italian in me. My brain has this funny way of going into overdrive when I have something interesting to say, or I’m trying to make it point, and takes over my calm, rational side. 

3. Never make decisions when you’re emotional.
Again, I’ve done so-so on this one. I’m pretty impulsive by nature and when I realize I need to do something, I want to do it RIGHT AWAY! But, I have gotten more practical about my decision making, usually allowing things to sit before completely deciding. 

4. Read books for pleasure.
Yes! It’s a slow process, but I have done this one. When I made this goal, I was in the middle of my first year of my MFA, which required a total of 20 books per semester for the lit classes I was taking. Ah! The back-to-back reading turned me into a very, very slow reader, as I wanted to be sure I wasn’t missing anything potentially important while reading. Let me tell you, that’s not a fun way to read. I’ve been working on bouncing back from that. I have little time to read during the school year because I’m up to my ears in papers to grade, but I’ve managed to read The Secret HistoryThe Girl on the Train, and Station Eleven, and I loved all of them. Just finished Everything I Never Told You, which was amazing. AH-MAZE-ING. This book will stick with me for a while. Do yourself a favor and add it to your reading list now. 

5. Open your windows. Go outside.
This one seems kind of silly, but I am trying to do this instead of lounging on my couch all day…which has happened a lot, unfortunately. BUT I’m finally running outside again, post-leg injury (knock on wood). I also take advantage of the apartment’s pool, as well as walking to the grocery store instead of driving. Even though it’s blazing hot, it’s nice to get outside. Plus, I have huge windows which make my apartment feel luxurious. 

6. Stop making excuses.
Eh. I’ve gotten better at this, but I still come up with the excuses in my mind, even if I don’t use them. Since I’m sort of anxious/shy by nature, I’ll often think of reasons not to do something, even if it’s just meeting friends for a drink. BUT I will say that I didn’t use my broken leg as an excuse to not grade my classes, other than for the day I was actually in the hospital. 

7. Allow yourself to have free time, even if it’s 10 minutes of coffee in the morning, 2 minutes to play Scramble with Friends, or a date with your boyfriend to watch Titanic. Don’t laugh—Rahul and I totally did this the other night.
Free time is my best friend. I probably take too much advantage of it. How else am I going to watch all of my favorite TV shows constantly? 

8. Celebrate something at least once a day, if not more.
This is hard to track. I am trying to get better about focusing on things I DO do during the day–cue Chandler Bing–instead of things I haven’t done. Doing this helps cut my anxiety and also helps me enjoy my days a little more. 

9. Catch up with a different friend once a week.
THIS IS SO HARD and I’m also really bad at it. I’m the queen of texting, but suck at phone calls. I’ve kept up with friends, but it’s more sporadic than scheduled, which is actually fine with me. 

10. Keep your attitude in check, always. Be intentional in what you say.
I’m good about this when talking with my students, but sometimes bad when talking to friends or family. Working on it! 

11.Listen to others. Take notes. Remember.
Again, another one that is so-so. I definitely haven’t taken notes (come on, 25 year old Katherine), but I do try to be a conscious, observant listener. 

12. Don’t be scared of confrontation, when necessary.
Hmm. If I was making this last now, I would change it to “Don’t be scared to hold your ground.” I definitely struggle with this in my teaching–at my core, I want to help each student be their best, but I’ve had to acknowledge and understand that it sometimes just doesn’t work that way. 

13. When you make a mistake, never, ever blame it on someone else.
I’m pretty good at this. I had a teacher in college that would never take the blame for mistakes he made (i.e., we would put something in the newspaper because he said we could, and then go back on his word, etc), so I vowed to never be like this because it’s so disrespectful and wishy-washy. 

14. Laugh at yourself.
Um, yeah. All the time. 

15. Do things YOU want to do.
Also all the time. Stay tuned for my coffee shop series to see an example of this!

16. Don’t say sorry when it’s not your fault, and do say sorry when it is.
This is a hard one, especially since I say sorry all the time for stupid reasons. 

17. Engage.
What? As in get engaged? Okay, yeah, I did that. : ) 

18. Talk to strangers, or someone you wish to get to know better.
HAHA! I’m definitely the type to have few, close friends, instead of a 1,000 friends. Of those people, I try to ENGAGE and get to know them better. I definitely don’t talk to strangers. This was definitely written by optimistic Katherine. 

19. Do things that remind you of what you love in the world.
I really try to stick to this, especially living near such an awesome city! Since writing this blog, I’ve traveled to some beautiful places (India, Paris, London, New Orleans, Provincetown, just to name a few), which definitely reminds me what I love in this world. Visiting and doing things in DC allows me to take advantage and enjoy a city I love, even if it’s just driving to the Trader Joe’s on U Street. 

20. Try new things. My recent fascination: baking and cake decorating. Sorry, Mary Beth, but I’m probably going to ask to use your kitchen a lot this summer.
Mary Beth, do you remember if this happened? I don’t know. BUT I did get into a serious baking frenzy after moving to my new apartment. My masterpiece is banana chocolate chip bread. 

21. Don’t bullshit. Ever.
I’m pretty good with this, but this is also so broad. Don’t bullshit about what? I’m not sure what I was thinking here. 

22. Embrace who you are, even if you sometimes don’t like who you are.
OH BOY. I’ve had some ups and downs in the past three years. I’ve had many moments where I didn’t like myself, and many moments where I did. However, I think that’s natural for most people. Regardless, I am working on embracing the parts of me that are inherent, and changing the things I can change. 

23. Tell people what you think of them at every chance you get, whether it’s “You’re a rockstar” or “I appreciate you” or “You inspire me” or “I love you.”
I do try to do this! If it’s my students, I let them know when they’ve done good work. I tell my family and Rahul how much they mean to me and how much I love them constantly (so they don’t forget, haha). When someone helps me out, I try to say thank you or that I’m appreciative. 

24. Don’t waste a day with a bad mood. Find things to cheer you up.
I wish I knew what this video was, but the account has been deleted! oops. But I do try to do this, although when I get in a REALLY bad mood, it’s hard for me to come out. Usually it’s because I’m freakin’ stubborn and want to sulk. 

25. Love.
Yes! 

And an extra one because I have problems with limits (even when they’re my own):

Don’t complain about things you can control. This is a MAJOR one to remember for me as of late.
OH MY GOSH, I still struggle with this SO MUCH. The kid taking too much time at the water fountain, the traffic on the way to school, you name it. I’ve really tried to work on these things and let these complaints go, because, when I do, I feel lighter and happier. But sometimes I just want to be mad at the world. 

My Favorite Moments from the “Gilmore Girls” Reunion

The original post was updated once I realized the original panel I watched was EDITED. WHAT THE HELL, EW. I have since watched the whole damn thing. 

There’s a lot of these posts going around right now, but what the heck. Since it’s already been CLEARLY established that I’m a “Gilmore Girls” fan, generation 1 (since season 2, baby!), I want to share some of my favorite moments from the ATX TV festival reunion.
Disclaimer: I’m aware of the Today show interview as well, but have not had a chance to watch it. 

First, let me establish my ethos.* This is what I teach my students, so it’s only right that I do it myself, right?

I discovered “Gilmore Girls” right at the end of its first season. If I remember correctly, I caught the very last episode of season 1 after a “7th Heaven” episode. (I know, I know, my family and I used to watch “7th Heaven,” let’s just all accept it and move on.) I don’t know why, but the show clicked with me. My soon-to-be high school self just knew it was a show I would love.6f910260-bb5d-0131-1add-120afe85a4f5So when the second season was about to start (remember that? anxiously waiting for seasons, back in the pre-Hulu and Netflix days when you couldn’t just watch the old seasons on repeat during the summer?) I told my mom I wanted to watch the show. She agreed to watch it with me and, soon, Tuesdays nights were GG nights in our household. My mom, sister, and I would gather around the TV and watch the newest episode.

One thing I wish the second generation of fans could appreciate is the true experience of watching “Gilmore Girls” as it originally aired. The anxiety of waiting between seasons 2 and 3 to see what was going to happen with Rory and Jess. The pure joy of watching season 3, knowing every episode was special and hilarious. The treat of watching the town of Stars Hollow develop and grow as the show did. When Rory graduated from high school, I had just finished the 10th grade, but I still remember my mom crying at Rory’s graduation speech and itching for that special day to arrive for me. (Even though I wasn’t valedictorian).

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The sheer pain of watching the end of season 4 and beginning of season 5 as Rory and Lorelai fought, mixed with the PURE ELATION at Lorelai and Luke FINALLY KISSING. Season 6 aired during my first year of college, and I hated the episodes where Rory and Lorelai weren’t talking, as their relationship was the lifeblood of the show. I continued to come home every week to watch the show with my mom (I went to college in my hometown), sticking by its side even as it grew weary and tired in the 7th season, it’s wind (and Amy S-P) knocked out of its sails.
One of my biggest pet peeves is people who adore and love a show, yet pretend certain seasons don’t exist. Sure, season 7 is a far, far cry from the other six (watch season 7 and then go back immediately to season 1 for a hilarious treat), but it’s still part of the show. To continue on with my ship metaphor–I’ll go down with the ship even if it sinks, because I LOVE THE SHIP SO MUCH!

“Gilmore Girls” was truly a formative show for me. Obviously, I understood that the show was fiction and I lived in reality (sadly), but I grew in so many ways just from watching GG. Through listening to their fast-paced, sharp dialogue, I grew as a writer. Even now, the dialogue amazes me. Through listening to the quick-witted Lorelai and Rory, I gained a quick wit of my own (although it’s pretty rusty at times). Through absorbing the cultural references on the show, I learned about many, many different things that I would not have had access to otherwise. Even now, when I watch the show, I’ll catch a quick reference to something that I can understand and appreciate in new ways. (Plus, for you first generation fans, I totally looked through those “cultural guides” in the DVD collections.) The show was the biggest cultural impact for me as a teenager/young adult and, even now, as I realize how shitty of a boyfriend/person Dean is; as I understand how snobby and pretentious Rory became when she started Yale; as I see how thick-headed and stubborn Lorelai could be with her relationship with her parents; I LOVE THIS SHOW AND I WILL LOVE IT FOREVER.

Okay, now that my ethos is THOROUGHLY established, let’s go through some of my favorite moments from the ATX reunion. 

1.  Lauren Graham mouthing “he was in insurance? I don’t remember that” when Amy S-P stated their reasoning behind why Richard was an insurance man. Clearly, she hasn’t been marathoning the show on Netflix with the rest of us….

2. A Canadian Dean?

3. I love that 1) Milo V. called Matt Czuchry “Mattie,” 2)Matt C. and Jared P. are both team Jess, 3) Matt C. interrupted Amy S-P’s discussion about what kind of character she wanted Logan to be by saying he was “kind of a dick”, 4) Alexis Bledel refused to pick and instead talked about what good actors they were, and 5) Scott Patterson ended the whole conversation by saying “none of you are good enough for Rory.”

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THANK YOU SCOTT P. YOU HAVE ONCE AGAIN REMINDED US THAT A WOMAN’S LIFE (OR, IN THIS CASE, A FICTIONAL CHARACTER’S LIFE) SHOULD NOT REVOLVE AROUND WHICH MAN IS BETTER FOR HER. THIS IS AN OLIVIA POPE SITUATION ALL OVER AGAIN:

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4. Amy S-P stating that “at least she got this” about “Gilmore Girls” and her career. Never a better reminder that we owe literally ALL of this to her.

5. Lauren Graham saying “does he have a girlfriend?” when Scott Patterson was musing where Luke was in life. The answer he gave (she comes out for fly-fishing lessons?) was so strange and also so not-Lorelai.

6. Yanic Truesdale saying he never really understood why Michel was in Stars Hollow in the first place. Ha! Good point.

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7. Liz Torres calling Stars Hollow “Scott’s Hollow.” Eh, close enough.

8. I love that Liza Weil stated she was really freaked out about the Paris character and that they created it specifically for her…watching the show, you would never know! She’s Paris through and through.

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9. Alexis and Lauren (yes, we’re on a first name basis now) whispering to each other about what happened on the first day of set to confirm before sharing. Also, even though I’ve read this somewhere else before, I still love the fact that Lauren had to essentially carry Alexis around the set to help her meet her marks.

10. Scott Patterson admitting his age, whether he meant to or not, by expressing shock that his comments on the podcast “Gilmore Guys” went viral on the internet. By saying, “it was just a little podcast,” he definitely demonstrated that he does not know how the internet works.
But I do agree with his comment that “it’s kinda time” for a TV/movie “Gilmore Girls” reunion.

11. When Kelly Bishop stated that “I know this woman” about her desire to play Emily Gilmore. Just as good as Lauren Graham stating she didn’t want ANYONE ELSE playing Lorelai.

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12. Amy S-P stating that an on-screen reunion would have to be done “right,” and then saying, “the good thing is that no one here hates each other.” Whew, I was worried.

13. They saved a seat for Edward Herrmann. Hearts.

14. Lauren Graham asking why “Oy with the poodles already” is so popular and then saying “that’s so funny” when the audience explained the phrase and its inception on the show. I especially love how Amy S-P responded with “oh, now it’s funny!” Similarly, Alexis Bledel stating “What’s copper boom?” Then pretending she remembered…seriously, the two have the same memory of filming the show that I do of high school. I.e., nothing is remembered.

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15. This statement from Keiko Agena makes me sad and laugh at the same time: “We didn’t know it [the show] was ending, I would have stole so much!” It makes me sad to be reminded that the actors didn’t know the show was ending, even though the seventh season sucked, but also laugh that the characters took things.
But seriously, though. The show could have had a “Community” style comeback, a la season 5. Dan Harmon got to come back, why can’t Amy S-P? 

16. Amy S-P stating “they would validate my parking” when asked how the show’s pitch would be received now. So true, though. With the end of shows like “30 Rock” and the move of “The Mindy Project” to Hulu and “Community” to Yahoo, it’s very clear that a show has to either be “classically” funny or created by Shonda Rhimes to make it on network television.

17. I swear, Lauren Graham is my spirit animal. When she said, “If I could stop talking about Bobby Flay, I’d say they’re [Lorelai and Luke] still together, 100%,” I knew, once again, that our babbling capabilities are equal.

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18. I loved, LOVED that Lauren stated the rift between Lorelai and Rory was hard to deal with as an actor on the show, but also that Amy S-P defended the need for the rift on the show. As she said, it was time for Lorelai to pull out the mom card and for Rory to act out. Still, so hard to watch!

19. I loved hearing Amy S-P speak a little on writing for the show, specifically on how she wrote lines and jokes for each character. Her discussions of jokes working for multiple characters not being good writing is a great reminder oh how important character development is. Plus, let’s be real, this statement of hers was a true testament to all writers everywhere:  “I’m a writer, man, it’s what I gotta do! I can’t do open heart surgery, I got no other skills. If I didn’t do that shit, who’s gonna watch the show?

20. Lastly, I’m so glad Lauren Graham put an end to the questioning about what the final four words of the show were going to be, if Amy S-P had stayed on. I was already kind of annoyed at the moderator, but I got REALLY annoyed when she asked Amy’s husband if he wanted to share the final four words.

That’s like getting a no from one parent about going out, or whatever, and then immediately turning to the other parent to hopefully get a different answer. Rude and uncalled for. I’m glad Lauren stated she didn’t want to know the last four words unless she was speaking them or hearing them spoken to her. With that comment, I believe the mother voice has spoken and we should all stop harassing them about it. I mean, also, think about it: what if the last four lines are “you’re dead to me” or something like that? Then we’ll wish we never asked to hear them in the first place.

Bonus: I had NO IDEA that there’s a GILMORE GIRLS DRINKING GAME. Also, I loved the sassy kid who asked the very last question. When Amy S-P stated she would not buy him beer, he responded “Well that wasn’t my question, thank you very much.” So much sass. So great.

That’s all, folks.

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*As further proof of my ethos, I obviously aced this quiz.

Saying Yes to the Dress: Part 2

After weeks of nonstop grading, a much-needed trip to my hometown, wedding cake tasting and flower picking, celebrating my dad’s 60th birthday, and several cuddle sessions with our family cat, Bella, I have finally found time for Saying Yes to the Dress: Part 2.

My sister and I decided to match at my dad’s 60th birthday party. We also decided to practice different poses while taking pictures:

I call the series below Bella with Katherine’s Laptop (and doesn’t help grade):

Now that I’ve overloaded you with pictures, let’s get on to the actual post.

Before dress shopping, I got a few tips from friends and websites on how to best approach the whole process. Most of the tips were simple: set a budget, scout ideas beforehand (while also being open to other choices), take a few favorite people with you to each store, and keep your store visitations to a select few places. 

Well, I did really well with the first three: I set a very clear budget in the beginning and stuck to it, screenshotted dresses on Pinterest and cut some out of magazines, took my mother to every single dress shop (except for one, when my sister tagged along as well), and made initial appointments at three dress shops that I had researched extensively online. I just knew that I was going to find THE dress at one of these first appointments, because that’s what my friends and every single TV/movie featuring wedding dress shopping had told me.

Guess what? I was wrong.

If you read my last blog post, you know that somewhere between the 3rd and 9th bridal store visit, I disappeared into a tulle-induced frenzy where I was determined to try on every single dress that I might REMOTELY like. I was on a crazy dress path and it was going downhill fast. I was waiting for that “ah-ha” moment when I put on the dress and everyone around me starts clapping and crying instantly. I’m not making that part up–I’ve literally read a blog post where a bride said this happened to her. So, in my crazy bridal mind, I was determined to have that same moment because, dammit, why not! I tried and retried dresses, determined to have an ah-ha moment of my own.

But then, something my best friend said to me brought me back to reality: “The TV/movies lie to you. The dress is important, but it doesn’t make the wedding, and definitely doesn’t make the marriage.” (I’m totally paraphrasing because I can’t find the original text).

There is a reason we have best friends, and it’s for times like these. Her simple text reminded me that just because the “ah-ha this is the dress” moment happens all the time in the media doesn’t mean that it has to happen to me. Every person’s dress shopping experience is different, and every PERSON is different.

This is the same rule that applies to the reaction to getting proposed to. Even though I always pictured that I would cry, as that’s what you see in the movies/etc, I instead started in utter shock at the ring. On an unrelated note, I’ve also started to think that men holding women’s purses when they shop is not a real thing, but something started in commercials/TV shows. More on this to come.

After this text, I slowly came back to reality and the rest of the wedding dress shopping experience became a little easier, as outlined in my first post. Here, I want to share a few dress shopping guidelines–as it there weren’t enough already out there–to remind other soon-to-be-brides that it’s okay if the “ah-ha” moment takes some time, or happens in a different way than you expected.

Wordifications’ Endorsed Wedding Dress Shopping Guidelines

1. Plan beforehand. Like I outlined above, going in with an idea of the dress you’re looking for is key. This seems like a no-brainer, but it’s a helpful reminder.

2. Say no and be firm to dresses you are not interested in. You will be offered plenty of dresses that are not your type or are too pricey. Just because that trick works on other customers–oh, you love the dress? oh, it’s $500 over your budget? oh, you want it anyway? perfect!–doesn’t mean it has to work on you. I’m a perennially nice person when it comes to interacting with salespeople, often too timid to really speak my mind, but I said no when necessary.

3. The step above helps trim down your dressing room options, which is key. You don’t want to take a bunch of dresses you don’t actually like back to the dressing room, and waste your time trying them on, when your dream dress is probably somewhere else in the store. Especially in stores that have a strict appointment time limit, say yes to only your favorite picks.

4. At the same time, say yes to different styles–within reason. Like, if you know you will never, ever want to wear a huge ball gown type dress, then mark those off completely. But, if you know you are open to, say, strapless, even though it’s not your first choice, then try on some strapless dresses. You never know, you might find the dress this way. Let’s just say that’s how I found mine–although my dress doesn’t fall into any of the above categories. Like I would give away what the dress looks like on this blog!

My emotions (in gif form, of course) about halfway through the whole dress shopping process: 

5. Don’t put your hopes on one store. Let me repeat. DON’T PUT YOUR HOPES ON ONE STORE. This was the big dress shopping mistake I made and it ultimately lead to my wedding dress-shopping-frenzy. I was so disappointed that I hadn’t found the dress at this specific store that SO many people had vouched for, that I spun out into a wedding panic.

Which store, you ask? Well, about 2 1/2 hours away from my hometown in TN is Low’s Bridal & Formal, which so happens to house the largest bridal selection in the mid-south. Sounds perfect, right? My mom and I heard about the store and, after asking for opinions on FB on whether or not a visit to the store was worth it and getting a resounding yes from many people who got their dress there, I made an appointment. After such praiseworthy FB comments, I was positive that I was going to find THE DRESS here. Like, steroid-induced confidence positive. And I did find many lovely dresses at this store, ultimately whittling it down to two favorites. Yet, while I was looking for the “THIS IS THE ONE!” moment, I instead spun off in a totally different direction: stressed, anxious, and confused. Sure, I had found some lovely dresses, but none of them were THE dress. Instead of feeling excited that I had found good options, I was stressed about the whole process and upset at the blind confidence I had placed in the store after hearing such rave reviews about it. I had planned on walking out with a dress purchased, and I instead walked out (well, rather, hobbled-I was still in the boot from my fracture!) confused, angry, and a little bitter, which is SO not the emotion you want to get from wedding dress shopping.

The visit to Low’s slowed down the whole process a bit instead of speeding it up, as I had hoped. Even though many, many people raved about the store, I finally accepted that their positive reviews didn’t mean jack if I wasn’t finding the dress I wanted, even in a store that looked like it was straight out of “Say Yes to the Dress.”

Ultimately, going to 12 different stores paid off–I found THE dress, and I’ll be going to try MY DRESS on in a week and a half. However, if I had known some of the above reminders going in to the whole process, especially the fifth one, the process would have been a little easier. I finally had to remind myself: There are thousands of dress shops with millions of dresses (not really sure on that math) and NO WAY to try on every single one. I had to put aside my inner perfectionist and, once I did, I was able to calm down long enough to say yes to the perfect dress.

Saying Yes to the Dress: Part 1

GUYS. It has been a hot minute since I posted on this ol’ blog—55 days, to be exact. A lot has happened in those days: spring break, sending out our SAVE THE DATES, grading upon endless grading, day trips to DC with my mom,  a short hospitalization for a blood clot in my leg, an anxiety attack from said blood clot in my leg, physical therapy visits, weekend trips to New York (Soho shopping, yes please!), finishing Amy Poehler’s book, finishing Mindy Kaling’s book, watching “How I Met Your Mother” two times through, ordering HBO just to get HBOGo to watch “Veep,” starting “The Mindy Project,” job interviews, wedding planning, the list goes on…

But today, I want to write about the most exciting event of the last 47 days: FINDING MY WEDDING DRESS!

The journey to finally saying yes to the dress was a long one. My first official bridal store visit was on March 3 (Birthday Bride!), and I finally ordered THE DRESS almost a month later on April 2. During this time, my mom and I visited 12 bridal shops in 4 states, tried on countless dresses, developed a genuine distaste for excessive netting, and reached a near breaking point. Somewhere during the experience, after my third bridal store visit and before my ninth or tenth, I disappeared into a tulle-induced frenzy where I was DETERMINED to find the perfect dress. I had found a lovely dress at the 2nd store visit, but somehow convinced myself that I needed to be sure that a more perfect dress didn’t exist somewhere else. In this journey to satiate my inner voice, I tried on many dresses that were not my style at all, squeezed into size 8s and drowned in size 14s, and became more and more frustrated with the whole process. I was positive that I would find the dress while home for Spring Break and, when I didn’t, I returned home to Maryland disappointed that I would have to do the rest of the shopping by myself.

But then something miraculous happened—I spent a day in the hospital for a fractured leg-induced blood clot, after which my mom flew back to Maryland (after already spending 3 weeks with me during my hobbling stage, because she is the best) to spend another 2 weeks with me while I adjusted to a new medication and lived in an anxiety-induced fear of what was happening in my body (watching this video on repeat helped ease my mind and also laugh). While the circumstances for her return to Maryland were crappy, her second visit in 2015 meant one, very exciting thing: we could finish wedding shopping together!

We made a few more appointments in other bridal shops in Maryland, even though I was starting to get tired of the whole experience, which was kind of frustrating. Its wedding dress shopping; how can it be frustrating? I had gone into the whole experience expecting a Monica Geller moment of finding the perfect dress, complete with a “THIS IS THE ONE!” exclamation, pushing all those around me into tears immediately (ok, that last one is a bit of a stretch), with an immediate sense that this dress was going to “complete me.” But then, I had a moment of realization, plus a real talk with my BFF and countless conversations with my mother, and came to understand that I wasn’t buying a wedding dress in the movies. The ah-ha moment is fabricated, in those situations, and I also realized that I’m not even a “ah-ha” moment kind of gal. I just knew I wanted to find a dress that looked and felt amazing, and I started to push myself to hard in finding this dress.

After a few conversations about this frustration, my mom and I set an April 1 deadline for picking the dress, after our last bridal appointments in March 31. A deadline! As a former journalist and current teacher, I love deadlines, and so I latched on to this quickly. I still liked a dress I had tried on at the second bridal shop, and had tried on countless other times afterward, but I wanted to be sure.

And, despite the lengthy journey, I’m so glad I did. On March 31, we visited our last two shops. The first visit was strange—they didn’t allow you to take photos while trying on the dresses (which I know is standard in many shops, but also kind of lame) and the woman helping me made a comment about how I can “wear the wedding dress again,” to which she asked “Why do you laugh?” when I, of course, laughed at what she said. She was being totally serious and implied that I could always make a short summer dress out of the wedding dress. Acc-a-scuse-me? I’m not turning my wedding dress into craft time.

So while the first visit was a bit disappointing, the second visit was so different. Maybe it was because I knew this was our last bridal store visit, no matter what, or maybe I was just in a good mood, but this last store was lovely! Not only were we the only ones, but the dresses were spread out instead of being crammed together, which made browsing a lot easier. Because there were fewer dresses, and this was our last visit, I ended up trying on a few dresses I would have said “heck no” to at other places. Because of this, I finally had a mini-bridal moment. I tried on a dress that I normally would have turned away, and immediately and instinctively knew that this was the dress. It was very similar to the other favorite dress I had tried on several times, but upped the ante just enough to knock the other dress out of the ballpark. I tried it on twice, twirled it in, sent pictures to my sister who immediately approved, and immediately went for fro-yo afterwards to discuss the decision with my mom.

During the whole process, my mom provided the perfect balance of “this is your decision” and “that dress does/does not look like you.” She never pushed me toward a dress, while also pitching in when she could tell I was unsure about a dress I had tried on. She did intervene when I was in my tulle-induced frenzy to tell me I had gotten away from my original dress goals, which was true, and which was exactly what I needed to hear. But she didn’t hide her excitement when we actually PURCHASED THE DRESS, which was such a surreal moment for me that it took a trip to Old Navy and the mall for the realization to sink in. I had found the dress! I’m so happy that my mom was there to finish the wedding dress journey with me; it would not have been the same without her.

We found the dress at the last shop visited and bought the dress at the first shop visited, which adds a nice touch of symmetry to the whole process. Come back in a few weeks for “Saying Yes to the Dress: Part 2”, presented in list format, of course. But first, grading. And grading. AND GRADING!!!!

 

What I’ve Learned While Using Crutches

Remember when I thought I had sprained my ankle? Well, after walking on that ankle for two weeks (with a brace and then nothing), I found out I actually fractured my ankle. Great news!

I was given a boot and crutches to use and then immediately broke down in Perkins Restaurant while having breakfast with my parents. I was home for the weekend for a sorority alumni event, and my dad suggested I visit the doctor since my ankle was still quite swollen. After the nice doctor delivered the horrible news, I had flashes of never being able to walk again, of my ankle falling off, and other sorts of dramatic and wild visions. I reeled myself in a little, but was still frustrated/upset/downright pissed off that I hadn’t known it was fractured any sooner. Plus, the horrible news meant there was absolutely no way I’d be able to run the Cherry Blossom 10-Miler, which I’ve run the past two years and is also my absolute favorite race. So, I let all of this emotion and general upsetness boil inside me until I started crying in Perkins, because what girl doesn’t occasionally cry in a public place?

Soon after that, my parents and I decided my mom would fly home with me, as she was flying to Maryland the next week anyway to visit me for two weeks. For that first week or so, I was heavily relying on the crutches and couldn’t get around very easily at all. While I’m sure I would have managed, having my mom here has been the BEST THING EVER! Not only because she drives me to work and basically takes care of me like I’m a small child who can’t do anything for herself (it’s hard to get around on those crutches!), but because I love when my mom comes to visit! Even though we can’t enjoy the area as much as we normally would (going on walks, venturing into DC, other walking-related activities), we’ve still had a fabulous time going to see movies (The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel for the win!), baking delicious French meals, having long conversations, and trying out lots of wine. Oh, and the BIGGEST THING: trying on WEDDING DRESSES! AHHH! Blog post on that coming soon.

I have really enjoyed having her here with me and will be sad when she has to leave. Luckily, we are going back to TN together for Spring Break, so I get to hang out with her (and the rest of my family) for a little while longer.

And now to the title of this blog post…

What I’ve Learned While Using Crutches (and wearing a boot):

  • A lot of people will open the door for you.
  • Many people, strangers included, will say “that looks bad” or “be careful” or “oh no, I hope you feel better soon.”
    To which I want to say “I feel fine.” I’m not sick, my body is working to repair these fractured bones with what I can only assume is magic. But then I remind myself they are just trying to be nice.
  • Your students will ask how you are doing. A few will even open the car door for you, as your mom is waiting at the curb outside of school to pick you up.
    Side note: Moms, especially mine, are the best.
  • Speaking of Moms, she will take care of you and bring you coffee and help you get around and remind you to stop hopping around on your one good foot because you’re going to injure yourself some more (which I’m surprised I haven’t yet). I feel like I can’t say enough about how great it has been to have her here. The time has gone by so fast, which is great for the healing process, but not for the Mom hangout time.
  • They aren’t fun. As a kid, I always thought crutches looked fun. That’s because I didn’t have to actually rely on them to get around. Mark this down under other things I’ve stopped desiring that I once wanted in my childhood, like glasses and curly hair (oh wait, I still kind of want the last one).
  • Many people will stare. Some even point, like this woman at Trader Joe’s yesterday, who then said (loudly), “Something’s wrong with her leg.” THANK YOU FOR STATING THE OBVIOUS.
  • I really, really  can’t wait to get back to my normal mobility. I’ve started doing a Pilates 4-week challenge because I CAN’T DO ANYTHING ELSE and in my mind I’m going to gain 1,000 pounds. I’m telling you what, that creative imagination of mine is going CRAZY right now.

Overall, I have been surprised and thankful at how nice most people have been in helping me get around, even if it’s something as small as opening the door for me. A little help goes a long way.

 

Life’s Random Moments

For a long, long time, I’ve been amazed at how seemingly random life can be while also fitting together like a puzzle. What do I mean by this? Some examples: you randomly recall a scene from a movie you haven’t seen in a while, only to find it on TV later that day. A friend you haven’t spoken to in a few months pops into your mind, only to be followed by a text message or email from them soon after. While cleaning the apartment, you stumble upon a folder of random documents, only to realize you need one of the next day. See what I mean?

So yesterday when I filled my ice trays because I knew I would be making a smoothie this morning, I didn’t think anything other than “I like ice in my smoothies.” This morning, I made a banana blueberry smoothie (which was DELICIOUS, I loosely followed this recipe) and went on to my merry way to work. I was running late, of course (if you’ve been reading, you know this is a CHRONIC problem of mine), so when I parked I had just the right amount of time to get to my class.
Side note here: For the past few months, I’ve been parking at my old boss’s house near the campus. It’s free street parking, and it’s only a 10-minute walk through the woods to my classroom.
I quickly walked through the neighborhood to get to the trail through the woods. On the downhill slope to the trail, I slipped once on the pavement–for some reason, my favorite boots are very slippy when on pavement. Good combo, right? I caught myself and was just thinking “thank God I caught myself” when BOOM, I slipped again and I found myself, suddenly, on the ground.

Now, last time I fell like this, I was running through Rock Creek Park, and I had a moment of “what the hell is going on here?” This time, all I felt was pain. My left leg was screaming out in pain and I sat there for a few moments, holding my knee, simultaneously urging the pain to subside while also thinking “my class starts in 7 minutes.” Even though it hurt to move, I picked myself back up, drove to class paid for parking (there was no way I was gonna make it through the woods on my left leg) and taught my two classes.

I know. I’m a champ.

In reality, I taught my classes, but my brain was fuzzy. The immediate pain was so sharp, I thought I was going to throw up. I’ve never had a serious sports injury, so I had really no idea what to do. In class, I was in pain and distracted, and struggled remembering the names of my students. One of them gave me an ice pack, which was incredibly nice, and another offered to help me walk to the health center. So, even though I was having a real off day, they seemed to look past that and amaze me with their kindness.

Flash forward to the health center (after my awesome friend, Steve, met me at my class to drive me to the health center), where I realized in the waiting room the TRUE IRONY of the fact that I had just filled my ice trays the night before I sustained an injury that is best healed with compression, elevation, and ICE. I literally never have ice in my trays. Granted, I have frozen veggies, which work just the same, but I found myself laughing, thinking about this. Again, it’s life taking a bunch of random moments and showing how they all fit together in one, neat puzzle.
Most of the time.

I’m hoping the ankle (which is sprained) will heal soon-ish because I just started training for the Cherry Blossom 10Miler and I’m only 15 days into my 30 Days of yoga. : ( I always have a hard time not getting back on my feet when I hurt myself in any way, but Rahul is great about reminding me to care for my body now, instead of paying for it later (in the form of worse injuries).

SPEAKING OF RAHUL, today is our six-month engagement anniversary!!!! I can’t believe it has been six months! We’ve enjoyed the early stages, which were mostly filled with relaxation and enjoyment, but the next 6 months will definitely be more wedding-focused! We have our caterer, so another step down! I’m so looking forward to our slowly approaching wedding, and to marry Rahul, who puts up with everything from wedding freak-outs to ankle injury whining. He seriously is the best person ever.

my head is fuzzy and there are kleenexes everywhere

The title of this post perfectly captures the state of my current self, apartment, car, and everything in between.

At some point last week, Katherine caught something sicky. Then at some point last week, this sicky thing progressed slowly to what was most likely a cold. Katherine self-medicated, watched hours of “Friends,” and basically did nothing in an effort to recover. She finally broke down last Thursday and went to the urgent care, where the doctor very annoyingly only prescribed sudafed and Robitussin, because the next morning she woke up with an even worse pain: A SINUS INFECTION.

This sinus infection has many side effects, which include: general tiredness, attachment to comfy surfaces, inability to sleep from coughing, Netflix binging, speaking in the 3rd person about oneself, general complaining and whiny noises, and just downright discomfort.

I’ve had what I thought were sinus infections before, but I was wrong. This pain is TERRIBLE and if I have ever experienced it before, I definitely blocked it from my memory because it was not a pain I wanted to hold on to. Luckily, I visited a much better doctor this past Saturday who gave me the medicine I need, but my head still feels like it’s been taken hostage. It’s gotten to the point where I can’t feel my teeth, I can’t organize the syllabus for my upcoming classes without forgetting everything I’ve ever known about teaching composition (because it all gets lost in the fuzzy brain), and there are literally kleenexes everywhere. Not symbolically. Literally. It’s like that scene in You’ve Got Mail where Meg Ryan has kleenexes all over her apartment, except without the Tom Hanks part.

Writing this post has been a nice distraction from the fact that I can’t focus on preparing my class syllabi without the head fuzziness kicking in. It’s a good thing the sickness is happening now, otherwise my poor students would have to suffer through confused ramblings. However, if I could be as funny as Leslie Knope when she’s sick and talking, I would be okay with that.

 

If Our Flight Gets Delayed, I Will Scream

This is what I said in response to a text from my Dad about an hour ago. Dramatic? Maybe. Am I serious about my reaction? Yes.

You might say I was channeling Michael Scott in my reaction:

Screen Shot 2014-11-25 at 12.29.07 PM

To back up: my dad, for some reason, felt the need to text me this article about weather concerns for Wednesday night travelers in the Mid-Atlantic to New England region of the country. When are Rahul and I flying out for Thanksgiving break? Wednesday night, of course. Why would my dad text me this article, knowing my history with flight anxiety? Probably just to inform me but now, of course, I’m panicking. It’s not just that I want to get home to spend a few days with my family–I’m REALLY REALLY looking forward to that and need the time away to refresh for the rest of the semester.

It’s that I can’t spend another night in the Baltimore-Washington airport.

Back in May (pre-Wordifications revitalization), I headed home to TN for my friend Alex’s wedding. I got a text alert about an hour before leaving for the airport that the flight had been delayed. However, given the anxious traveler that I am, I had my ride drop me off at the time we had planned, thinking I could spend an extra hour in the airport, no problem. I checked in, had some dinner, drank a beer, and read The Fault in Our Stars.

Then the flight was delayed another hour. And another. And two more. Next thing you know, the flight–originally scheduled for 8:10 pm–was delayed until 1 AM.

By the time the 1 AM delay rolled around, I had already circled the airport twice, so I decided to go to my gate and hope for the best. Of course, I found the other passengers all “hoping for the best” as well, except their hoping was much louder and much more complainy than mine. I listened to outraged passengers yell at the staff who could do nothing more than tell them what the computer screen was relaying to them–that our flight was delayed for “unknown” reasons.

The fun started, however, when the flight was canceled around 11 AM. They told us, immediately, that a new flight was being created for us at 6 AM the next morning and that we would also receive a $100 voucher. All we had to do was come to the desk to receive our new ticket.

Most passengers begrudgingly obliged, myself included. I think most of us realized that the situation was beyond our control, beyond even Southwest’s control, and just wanted to get our new ticket and go to sleep. I was actually relieved, because after hours of waiting anxiously, picking my fingernails, I could get some rest, knowing a plane would come at 6 AM to whisk me away.

But then there were the others.

The others, whom I also like to refer to as “The Whiners,” were, of course, sitting in a circle right beside me, so I overheard everything. For the next 2 hours, they did nothing but complain about how this was terrible, inexcusable, ruining their travel plans, ruining their lives, the worst thing that had ever happened. They complained, complained, complained. One man complained loudly and very openly in an obvious attempt to get the rest of us just as angry as he was. He was also the passenger that stormed up to the desk several times to remind the Southwest employees how upset and outraged he was. After that night, I decided that those kind of people are some of the worst. Not only did he want to be angry and upset, but he very clearly wanted to get everyone just as angry and upset as he.

While the experience was tiring and tried my patience–again, I refer to Shirley Bennett to describe what I was feeling–

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I decided, somewhere between our plane finally showing up at 2 AM (it had been delayed in Tampa and then again in Buffalo and the people on the plane were even more pissed than The Whiners) and falling asleep, curled up on one of those Southwest armchairs, that I could either join The Whiners and complain about how terrible this was, how it was ruining my life, how I couldn’t believe “they” had let this happen–while the weather was clearly the culprit–or I could just accept it, get some sleep, and look forward to arriving in Nashville the next morning. Luckily, I had scheduled my flight for Thursday evening, so I missed none of the wedding festivities (for which I was a bridesmaid) and was able to nap Friday afternoon to not feel so spacey.

Even though I rectified the situation in my mind, I don’t think I can do it again for one reason: The Whiners. That made everything 1,000 times worse. Tell me, please, how does complaining about a situation LITERALLY OUT OF YOUR CONTROL make you feel any better? I have complained plenty in my life, but either do something about it (like try to get on another flight) or just accept it and move on. Anything else in between is downright annoying.

That being said, I’ll leave you with this list.

Things I Learned Spending the Night in the Airport:

1. A scarf makes a great makeshift blanket. For this reason, I am taking my Zara shawl tomorrow just in case….

2. Pack socks in case you need to warm up your feet while trying to fall asleep.

3. Curling up in the huge armchairs is infinitely more comfortable than lying on your  back on the regular chairs.

4. Buy snacks early. Most of the shops close at 10.

5. Tell your other passengers that most of the shops close at 10 so you don’t have to listen to one of The Whiners complain about how “they should have told us there were no vending machines and that the shops close. I’m hypoglycemic, I have to have a snack!”

6. Resist the urge to slap said girl, or even gently point out that someone who is hypoglycemic should always have snacks on them, regardless of the situation.

7. Prepare your entertainment. Be sure to have TV shows ready, or a book, or even work to get you through the many, many hours.

8. If traveling alone, make friends with at least one other non-whiner person, so he or she can watch your stuff when you make bathroom runs.

9. Keep your frustration or exclamations of “I have somewhere to be!” to yourself. Everyone on the damn plane has somewhere to be, otherwise they wouldn’t be at the airport with you.

10. Run up and down the empty airport hallways, screaming at the top of your lungs. I didn’t do it but, hey, the rest of the place is empty so you might as well, right?

Kidding aside, I will scream, and possibly cry, if our flight is delayed. But I will do it internally, because I know everyone else will be feeling the same way. I want to see my family, dammit!